Walking Thoughts

 During the last few years that Fairfield Hospital as a psychiatric hospital, I work there as a team administrator for a secure award known as Orchard two. My role required me to go onto the secure award as part of the team caring for the patients. Typical meeting was attended by a psychiatrist, a psychologist myself, the patient and a representative of social services or other authority care figure such as a provider of social housing for example. Regularly the medical to the clinical team would visit prisons to make an assessment of potential patients. as upon an initial diagnosis. These patients would be returned to the hospital.. Through writing up the patient symptoms, the psychiatrists and psychologist observations, their diagnosis, treatment, recommendations and treatment plan. I learnt a great deal about mental illness at that time. Through interactions of friends and family outside of the hospital, as well as third-party services to the hospital, such as caterers, I learne...

 Prevention is better than cure. And prediction Provides better is better than prevention. When it comes to machinery, mechanical, electrical, assets, electronic assets, instrumentation, reactive maintenance is the cure for a symptom that is already occurring. Preventative maintenance, aim to maintain the machinery with an intervention before reactive maintenance is necessary. It could be triggered by an amount of time lapsed, or by the number of hours run or use of the asset upon conditions. For example, conditions would require more frequent preventative maintenance interventions. Predictive maintenance, intervenes on the basis of data. This approach, optimises, preventative maintenance, targeting equipment, most in need of an intervention, so reducing your maintenance bill. Preventative maintenance also can be applied to improve efficiency so saving on fuel and greenhouse gas emissions. Predictive maintenance, maybe using conduction with condition, monitoring equipment. Or it mi...

 Your legacy will have nothing to do with your background where you’re from. If you were to look at a tree and you could see only its roots you would not know what kind of tree it is. If you look at the fruit of a tree and you can see apples hanging from that tree then you know that you are looking at an apple tree. Appletree roots would not tell you what kind of tree it is. What we do in our lives what we become is what we will be recognised as. Unique don’t be recognised as that little girl from a poor family you’ll be recognised as a professional woman. Your legacy will be the things you participate in the things you contribute to your achievements and your accolades. These are the things that will make you proud. Membership of a professional institution, such as the institution i3 will give you professional recognition by working towards the professional grade of membership, and then of becoming a charted engineer, you’ll be recognised as a professional. You participate in prof...

 Jonathan is miserable this morning. He doesn’t really want to go to school I’ve made him his lunch, which, of course he usually does for himself, but he just wasn’t up to it. I found and started to complete the decks form for his decks yesterday, but I’ve left it now as I need to Choose the battles I fight fight with the battles fight. I’m feeling very down. I’ve loaded the dishwasher and set it to run. I’ve loaded the washing machine and set it to run. I’ve put the rubbish out and I’ve put out the dryer recycling. I amended my shopping order. I’ve brought it forward to Friday evening instead of Saturday morning is itself as forward from Sunday morning but there was no deliveries on Sunday morning as it’s Easter. I’d rather glad there was one on good Friday evening I’ve managed to get the cost down to £45.53. I’ve had toilet rolls. This one has wine in it for the first time in two months. This is because it’s the bank holiday and because I feel down. Yesterday, my alcohol units we...

 Early start to drop Jonathan off at the school for his school trip to Leeds armouries Make sure I packed him, glucose gel, orange juice and Haribo for hypo emergencies Return trip at 3:50 to collect him as the coach comes back just after the bus has gone. In between, I applied for a job and took a call from the recruitment agency to discuss that job. It is hopeful that I will have an interview before I go on holiday on April 6. Reached 1000 followers on LinkedIn. Replaced Jonathan s dexcom . Fitted a new one to his arm. Checked date and duration of last one. It has lasted 9 days. It is my job to call the dexcom technical team and let them know. Otherwise we will run out before delivery of the next batch. I found an online form to complete for the technical section of Dexon. I filled it out, but come to terms of the fact that it was effectively 10 days and will probably not run out before the next batch if it was less than a whole day so gonna leave it as it’s not really worth the ...

I wrote a I wrote an article on an article on Mental health And AI, this morning.  The School rang At 1 pm to ask what he needs to have with him for the school trip for history tomorrow tomorrow. They asked about short spins, and I assured them we’d have everything he needs on him to take with him on the day. He will take insulin needles, glucose, sweets, orange juice. He will fit his use into the cap of the needle once he’s used it and bring it home. You should only need the one for his lunch while he’s there and he should be home at the normal time. Jonathan, got home at just before 5 o’clock. His sugars are 4.3 I’m cooking him tea. I’ve weighed the carbohydrates which in this case is spaghetti of spaghetti Bolognese and I’ve used the information on the back of the sauce jar for the remainder of the carbs. He has elected to have garlic bread as well, so the title cuffs are his mail are going to be 86 g of carbs. I’ll let him know 10 to 30 minutes in advance so that he knows how m...

Just a few weeks ago, in February 2024, the British Medical Association, BMA, published a report deploring the inadequate mental healthcare system [0].  The BMA carried out in-depth interviews with doctors across the mental health system, including those working in psychiatry, general practice, emergency medicine, and public health. The report, “It’s broken” Doctors’ experiences on the frontline of a failing mental healthcare system", based on first-hand accounts of doctors working across the NHS, reveals a ‘broken’ system of mental health services in England. The current economic cost of mental ill health has been estimated to be over £100 billion in England alone*, but this report demonstrates that across the NHS, doctors are in an ongoing struggle to give patients the care they need because the funding is just not enough, there are not enough staff, and the infrastructure and systems are not fit for purpose. https://www.bma.org.uk/bma-media-centre/new-bma-report-highlights-brok...

 This morning has been awful. Jonathan asked for the day off school. He Doesn’t want to see a doctor. He says he needs the rest, and he might then be better and not need a doctor. I said if he’s not well, I should take him to a doctor. He found a rash on each arm. It felt like he was trying to find something to be wrong with him, so he could have the day off. I feel very sad. I don’t think he’s being bullied and he’s doing well in all of his subjects. Except PE and music. Last night, as is increasingly common, he slept from 5 pm until about 10 pm. I cooked his dinner while he was sleeping, and then kept it for him in the fridge until he was up. So he had dinner very late last night, and then was awake until after midnight. The amount of sleep doesn’t worry, me too much, because if he’s had five hours and then another five hours that’s 10 hours of sleep overall. But the pattern doesn’t seem to leave him rested for School. His sugars are fairly low and fairly steady. They are 10.2 th...

 This morning Jonathan has stomach pains and chest pains He does not have a temperature Checked his blood sugars, and they have been at 15 steady overnight I spoke to Dr Puthi at the out of hours diabetes team He recommended we measure his Ketones It’s always a bit of a job measuring Jonathan’s blood ketones, but when we went to the GP they only were able to do a urine ketone which is of no use to us according to the diabetes team. So I was very pleased to find that I have been organised and responsible, and I found his keto measuring machine in the cupboard with the strips exactly so I could lay my hands on them when we need them in an emergency such as this. After my conversation with Dr Puthi, and before starting the ketone testing which I know can take awhile I emailed the school to let them know that was keeping him home until we had tested his key and he gets his blood sugars down. The batteries are flat and I need to find replacements. This meant removing them from the scale...

 Well, he’s gone to school, it wasn’t easy, but he has gone. Today, the bus should leave about three minutes later, so he has every chance of catching it today. His sugars are steady at about eight. He says he has pain and it all hurts so much, but as he has PE this morning, this is a standard reaction. I followed his journey on 360 until I could see that there was definitely motor-vehicle movement, past north Wytham. Until then it was me that felt sick. I’ve said that he should give you go. It’s badminton today and his mission today is to hit that shuttlecock just once. His response is that he might throw up before then. Unfortunately, nearly an hour after he left, he still hasn’t passed Colsterworth. There has been a serious crash on the A1 and the bus can’t get where it’s going. More than that lots of lorries have joined the narrow roads to try and get around the A1 and they’re getting stuck. This means my diabetic child is now stuck on a bus. Neither I know his dad can get to h...

 I called the doctors for Jonathan‘s test results He had protein in his urine and was given to antibiotics A urine sample was sent to the lab This has come back satisfactory. They do, however, ask if his symptoms have cleared up, and I don’t actually know teenagers are not the most communicative of people. When Jonathan gets home from school, I do ask him and he has says that he’s well now. I gave Jonathan his dinner. We share a small bottle of chocolate, kinder, Bueno and he goes upstairs where he falls asleep until about 10 pm.

 Jonathan had a low glucose alarm just after midnight. At first his alarm goes off, which is a gentle ringing much like a morning alarm or a phone call ringing. Then the piercing strident alarm on my device goes off. His sugars are 2.4.  This happens twice in succession and Jonathan gets up to manage his sugars. 0654 check his sugars on my app and leave him to sleep. Sugars are steady. I go downstairs About nine, Just before. Leaving Don asleep. The desperate scrabble for sugar is evident in the debris in the kitchen. 0900 I clear up. I put the washing out and make myself tea and toast. I spend about an hour writing my book. It is self reflective leads to a lot of deep thought. What are these? I hope that one day we will live in the society where disabled people that are being violently attacked. They’re able to call the police and that the police will actually come to help them not come to join in. A further thought is that I ought to record my time as a witness support volun...

 The alarm went off at 7 am as it always does, but it was such a shock this morning. I don’t really know why, but clearly I was in a deep sleep, and I had slept well. Jonathan was still in bed at 7:10, which means he was running late. Ultimately, his dad and I gave him a lift into school at 8:10 as he had missed the bus. I am sure that there is a big problem with PE.

 Jonathan seemed depressed about going to school tomorrow. We had a conversation around 10:30 pm, but he was reluctant to say much. He said that I couldn’t change anything and he just had to get on with it. I suspect that is because he has PE is his first lesson tomorrow morning and he was putting his PE kit together at the time.

 I wake up about 6 am It’s been a good night and there were no low glucose alarms in the middle of the night Jonathan Went to bed late, but not terribly late. When his dad first left possibly about 10 pm, the sooner had his father left the front door behind him. Then I heard a man shouting, no no no. At first, I thought Gary had got into trouble on the front path. But then I realise that my son now has a deep voice sounds like his dad was in fact playing video games with his friends. Getting over my panic, I went to bed. I was glad that Jonathan also soon went to bed. So 6 am may have been about eight hours later, so that’s great. I thought a lot about my fatty liver this morning and the longer I can continue to have staying from alcohol. The higher my chances are of reversing it. I am sure. I imagine I can see it when I look at the top of my tummy and under my ribs I feel like I can see fatness there. I don’t know if that’s what it is I sort of imagining it and I suppose it’s beca...

 08 45. My alarm goes off so I can be sure of being up in time for the shopping delivery. I am in fact already up and passing the time with a video game as a shop is not here yet and Jonathan is asleep. 09 30 the shopping arrives I put it all away in the cupboards in the fridge in the freezer. I sort out the frozen rolls from last week to use for this week and separate the bread to be used right now from the bread to be used later. Jonathan remains asleep. Later, Jonathan emerges and gives me a Mother’s Day gift. It’s really sweet, and I had attached a picture. It’s a shame, his father couldn’t bring himself to at least take us out to Poundland for a little trip out and Mother’s Day eventually slips by. Jonathan makes me a cup of tea at the end of the day. I am blessed with my beautiful son.

 After a broken night, sleep dealing with Jonathan, low sugars, wake up quite groggy, bleary eyed Jonathan sleeps in until noon He is due to go out with his dad at noon to take his grandmother out for a Mother’s Day lunch. He gets up in time for his dad to arrive. I enjoy a few hours of respite. I’m just having lunch about 3 pm when Jonathan comes home. I asked him if he is hungry. He says no, almost horrified. A picture of What he ate for lunch. Plus ice cream.

 Jonathan has a temperature this morning he has still gone to School Measured Jonathan stemperature Discussed Jonathan symptoms Removed food items from kitchen cupboards checked best before dates built a meal plan to use items 10 day meal plan completed and £50 food order put in. Menu posted on kitchen door. 10 pm Cut up cheese for Jonathan to have cheese and biscuits Oh, 4:30 am Low glucose alarm 0,4 40 2 am low glucose alarm Check on Jonathan Jonathan is asleep despite two low glucose alarms Go downstairs, collect orange juice and hand them to Jonathan. Noticed that the cheese has not been eaten, but the biscuits are gone. Asked if he didn’t, fancy the cheese. Weirdly, given the time he said I’ll get to it later.

 Checked class schedule has double games today Made Jonathan’s lunch, including his sandwich, but it takes him longer to get ready or just his first thing, but also with double games in Easter pack games kit Jonathan leaves four minutes to get the bus His blood sugars. They are nice and steady and have been for the last 12 hours. Jonathan‘s blood sugars are still having a rise after breakfast I checked Jonathan’s location, two minutes after the bus has left and he’s on the bus. This is a big relief.. I find a job advertised I’m interested in doing and I plan to make a case for getting the job later

 Fitted new Decom to Jonathan Arranged for his dad to take him in to School as he missed the bus Check class charts Jonathan has a merit in art

 Dr Bigg  By Dr Bigg, mental health first aider. Awareness, acceptance and treatment of mental health has quite the history. There has been a long, slow, but remarkable progress in the development of mental health treatment. I am currently a mental health first aider, and previously I have worked in mental health at a psychiatric hospital. That same hospital was originally a lunatic asylum. The hospital was a building so iconic in its features as a lunatic asylum that it was twice used as a horror movie set. Thankfully, such settings for mental health treatment are now only a relic of the past. The hospital is now a private health spa. I For one hugely welcome such progress. As a society, we have moved from shutting people away to attempting to treat mental health, and have moved further from the stigma surrounding it until we have reached a point, whereby people embrace mental wellness and openly adopt practices such as mindfulness and mental health days. At the Psychiatric h...

 I waited in and took in Two parcels arrived today Both our prescriptions for Jonathan I had to be in to receive them they came about 11 o’clock One container, shots, bin, insulin, needles and glucose The second contained antibiotic, he needs to treat his current infection. Does sugars are looking better? I’ve been monitoring them and they are steadier today than yesterday.

 My alarm woke me up at 7 o’clock I clean my bathroom toilet having it soaking with a bleach tablet overnight I wash the kitchen windows and the cooker hood with soapy water Jonathan is in bed, complaining of stomach pain At 0800. I will be able to call the doctor and ask if he can see someone this morning. I have received an invite to interview for the voluntary post to content creation for a start-up using AI with empathy for mental health support. Taking Jonathan to the doctors at 09 40. Will leave the house at 9:15. Have emailed the School to let them know. We should be there by 11. If the doctor says it’s okay. Dr has said to keep him off school until his blood sugars fall. The whole morning has been taken up with monitoring sugars. E mailed the school to let them know. Diabetes nurse said to increase long term by 1 unit(to 22 units) so long as his midnight snacks are being taken with sufficient insulin.. It has been quite a fraught morning providing Jonathan with medical care...

 Finalised next weeks menu Finalised meal, plan and shopping order to be delivered tomorrow morning Budgeted total shopping cost is £44.03. Responded to WhatsApp messages messages from my group of university friends. They’ve been messaging for the past two weeks and I’ve only just found them. Applied for another job. another content creation job that is remote. The entrepreneurs is based in Sri Lanka or Singapore and it’s for an empathetic AI.

  Jonathan is off school sick today. I am at home, taking care of him. He had a urgent low glucose about 10 o’clock last night. So he ate some food and some sweets Before bed.  This morning, he has a sore throat and acid reflux and he is still suffering from feeling cold all the time. He’s reporting some pain in one of his arms. He seems alright in himself. My mate is lunch for School this morning before the decision was made to keep them off and I applied for the content creative job with formula Botanica.