Teddy boys are real okay?

 This story is just as true as it ought to be only some of the facts have been changed to improve the plot.

Once upon a time there were two bears Bob and Ben they were not twin twins nor were they just brothers they were littermates which the bear cub is very important.

They were discovered sleeping rough in a cupboard at grandma’s house and they told her as she explained later that they had nowhere to live and no one to care for them in the whole world. Grandma is a very kind lady, but she realised that she could not look after two young bears and see to grandad as well as grandad as most grandads are was a full-time job in himself.

However grandma knew of two little girls who would not mind in the least taking in to homeless teddy bears and so gentle reader that is how Bob and Ben came to live with Avril and Torill. (This, as all grandparents know, isexactly how most teddy bears find homes).

Bob and Ben are not ordinary baby teddy bears but quite grown-up adolescent I’m not afraid of big words teddy boys.

A little older than Ben but only a little has a 500 mL motorbike which you built himself. He and Ben worked together in the city of London for Brian who runs a motorbike Mesenger service and has a lot of patience.

Bob is very proud of his strength and doesn’t mind in the least moving furniture and opening jam jars.

He supports Liverpool football club and Ipswich town football club and is an ace MX Rider.

A little clever than Bob but only a little has a 250 mL MX bike which he built himself. He has a slight weakness in one eye and if he gets frightened or excited, his eyes crossed and un cross slow slowly.

Ben looks after the beehives but he and Bob have at the bottom of the garden. He supports West Ham and Ipswich town football clubs and helps to organise the MX trials at Hill farm where the bear’s friend Jenny works as sheep herd manager (They very unkindly for her bow peep).

The Bears have lots of other very good friend whom you will meet as this tale unwinds. I will do my best gentle reader to introduce them properly as they arrive, but please forgive my haste to tell the tale from time to time forget.

The proper beginning

Our roll rail live with the bears and their parents in the Essex country town which is most famous for the perversity of its traffic lights. At the time I saw begins the bears have no job jobs and spent their days tuning their bikes reading the paper and generally getting under foot.

That is the last straw shouted mother from the kitchen. Those bears will have to go they are more trouble than they are worth. Father slowly put his paper down, calm down I’ll see to it. What have they done this time?

The washing line all the washing is on the ground and there are tire marks all over the sheets again said and they’ve knocked over all the sunflowers.

Sunflower said father right I’ll speak to them immediately!

Write you to over here now called father as he strode out into the garden she’s cross of you again he said more quietly as I joined him if you guys want to keep her good books you’ll have to be a bit more careful in the garden. 

Brakes failed said then couldn’t test them on the road could we said Bob?

Well said father just to clear this mess up load those sheets into the washing machine while I make her a cup of tea and try and get round her

Okay, said Bob

Two sugars are please said Ben

Mother and father had a very long talk and when they had finished father told the Bears what had been decided

She’s not too keen to have you around the house under her feet all the time he said so I have suggested that you both try and get yourselves jobs. That’ll keep you out of trouble and you’ll both be able to pay toward or keep right.

The bears looked at each other throughout and I never have any idea what sort of job and uneducated teddy bear could get these days

Okay, they both said reluctantly

The job

The following Monday father drove the bears into Chelmsford gave him a pound for hamburgers and left them outside the job centre where they joined the queue one or two people stared but a young man George chatted to them first time said George yup said the boys any owes said George nope said Ben what owes said Bob School reading writing that said Ben said Bob 

Follow me, I’ll see you’re okay

George new Brenda the girl behind the counter quite well and helped the bear is filling their forms

Hi friend, said George, you think you doing?

You’re in luck said Brenda that bloke needs a dispatch rider again still only casual though

Great, give us the card and I’ll go anything going at these two can do

Do you know anything about motorbikes? Said Brenda?

Should think so I said George they do MX

Well said, Brenda Brian said that he needed an extra mechanic. I’ll ring him and see if he’ll take them.

Okay, said Brenda as you put the phone down

Brian says he’ll see you both, but only as your friend of George

The boys thanks Brenda and rushed off to the station with George give us the cash now I’ll get the tickets for all of us said George Ben handed him the pound that all said George won’t get you both to London you know look I’ll sub you for now and I’ll get it off Brian when we get there, but if you get the job, remember he’ll take it off your first weeks wages

To set the boys together

Once they were safely on the train, Bob said we’ll have to ring her you know

Who’s her said, George?

What runs the house said, Ben?

We’ll have to tell her where we are and who we’re with and when we’ll get home

Social, she’ll keep our dinner up that said Ben

Right said George well get some change and I’ll show you where the phones are at Liverpool Street station but wait until lunchtime so that you’ll know whether you’ve got a job with Brian or not

Okay, said Ben Wright said Bob

The interview

Hi George, said Brian, what’s this? A couple of mascots?

Nope said George these are the guy Brenda told you about they want jobs

By this time Benz eyes will be beginning to cross and cross as he began to wonder if Brian would give him his brother a job

Write Jude you know the robes go and get your bike out and start work U2 in the office we’ll have a little chat

Details first said Brian as kindly as he could

Bob and Ben said Bob quickly

Robert and Benjamin said Brian

Who’s that said, Bob?

That’s official for us said Ben Bob short for Robert and Ben Benjamin

Oh Bob

Any other name said Brian

Nope,, said Ben

I’d better put Beer then said Brian

Ages

Don’t know who said, but I said that we made the year that England last won the World Cup

16 said Brian

Can you change tires and main puncture, Brian?

Yes, and my brother here is very good with engines of all sorts made the lawnmower once even it goes backwards as well now

Alright, Brian, this job of sweeping up making tea going over sandwiches and helping in the repair shop when we are busy do you think you could do it?

Oh yes, said both the bears together

Alright then you’re on a weeks trial your hours at 8:30 to 5 pm and I’ll pay you same as I always pay the juniors but you must work hard now at lunchtime. I’ll get George to buy you season tickets for the rest of the week and I’ll take that out of next weeks wages.

Now your first job will be to make 16 cups of tea I’ll show you the kitchen now

And that gentle reader is how the bears got their job

The bees

Imagine an idyllic means very nice June Sunday in a picture book Essex garden I’m sunbathing remember me I’m writing this and gently daydreaming with a dense black cloud suddenly covers the Sun. The cloud revolve resolves itself into a menacing School bees which settled in the apple tree just over my head.

You will have realised by now that it is eye who run the house

Oh good said Bob honey

Get those insects out of my garden I shouted a little upset

Not easy said then

I’ll phone a beekeeper said fatherFather

After a short while father returned a bad news Dan the beekeeper was willing to come but his car had broken down and worse although he was willing to take the bees away for us he did not want another hive in his garden

I’ll fetch him said Bob

I suggested that said father, but he has to bring a skip and I’ll go anyway and see if I can fix his car

We went in and shut all the windows and waited an hour later. Dennis arrived with a skip and a hive in the back of the car and within 20 minute all but a few bees were in the sky and Ben was setting up a hive under the plum trees at the bottom of the garden. It was then I realised what was going on

Bob, I said quietly

Yup, said Bob

Are you intending to keep those bees in my garden?

Yup, said Bob

Are you intending to keep those bees?

I I said I don’t see that as a good idea

Oh said Bob

Oh please said Father the bears promise don’t you to keep them out of your way?

Oh alright I said I’m nicer than they think but if I am stung, just won’t ever buy any of those bees they go immediately

Oh, of course I said both the bears together too quickly for my liking

So that gentle reader is how the bears began to keep bees

Hill farm MX club

Imagine a foul means foul wet October Sunday in a grey Essex garden. I’m scraping mud and oil from the doormat and daydream of idyllic June days remember them when too excited bears rushing knocking me flat and treading more mud and oil onto the hall carpet. Go racing go racing they shout. Where is father dry? He seems to be the only one to keep dry on those very muddy days. Hill farm Suffolk said Bob okay? Says I suppose said father that you want me to drive you over there nope said Bob Eric said Ben.

Eric Watt said father

Eric, the policeman is taking us in his pick up said Bob

Sandwiches said Ben

Sandwich is what I said

Please nicely, would you make us sandwiches to take with us and a flask of coffee and a first aid kit?

Can’t eat first aid kit said Torill

How soon I asked

10 minutes said Bob so that gentle reader is how the bear has became members of the Hill farm MX club

Next November

Occasionally Brian allowed the bears to bring their bikes into the workshop to work on. He was quite impressed with the school they used in building and tuning their machines when they travelled with their bike from Essex to London they took them into the guards van and when the train was full, they travelled with their bikes One morning the train was very full so they stayed in the van without bothering to look for a seat also in the van was a middle-aged gentleman trying to reassemble the gears on the back wheel of his bicycle after he had admitted a puncture

Let me look at Bob

Do you know anything about bikes except the man?

Yup, said Bob already engrossed in repairing the wheel

There you go said Bob it all runs smoothly now and he stood back to admire his handiwork

Well, I’m blessed said the man thank you very much indeed

You’re welcome said Bob. I’m in bikes all day long.

Work for that dispatch firm near Liverpool Street station said Ben

Oh yes, at the man, my secretary uses them a lot. The name is Keith by the way and yours.

Bob

Ben

And they all shook hands

You should carry a spare and a tube it quicker to change a tube then remain acupuncture but I suppose like us you have to save up for spares said Bob

Oh yes, quite said Keith And the guard smiled

What do you do said Ben?

I’m an accountant said Keith

Oh yeah good job that we live with an accountant and his family look after other peoples money do you said Ben

Oh sort of said Keith

The bloke we live with he says we should put some of our money into the bank each week. He says we can get Brian to draw up a save as you earn scheme. What do you think? Keith replied Ben?

Oh well, it sounds as if he has the right idea. I think I agree with him. And the God smiled again and very nearly laughed out loud, but British rail gods don’t laugh much do they?

Of course accountants like you look after rich people’s money they have nothing to do with people who are broke do they?

Oh, you would be surprised. Said Keith.. Very surprised, he said half himself.

The very next day too large square envelopes arrived addressed to Bob and Ben at the messenger office

The early Christmas cards said Brian as they open them

Said Bob and invite the Lord show look the Lord Mayor has the same name is Keith what a coincidence

Was that manual helped on the train? Said Brian

And did he look like this?

Brian, trade my photograph in the newspaper

That’s him said Ben

Brian, that is the Lord mayor of London himself you helped the Lord mayor of London with his bike and an exchange he has invited you to ride in his coach and the Lord Mer show and look he has invited you to his fancy dress party in January and asked you to bring friends.

We’ll take our real said Bob

We’ll even take a said, Ben

And that gentle reader is how teddy bears got involved in the Lord may show and however unreal got to go to the Lord fancy dress party at the mansion house.